Ups and Downs

Today was not our best day.  Sorry to say, I failed to mentally record a cute conversation or moment to share with you.  And I just looked at the clock and suddenly remembered my "23 days of posts" challenge to myself.  So here's some ups and downs from our day:

UP: Micah woke up DRY this morning and stayed DRY all day long, even with a long morning outing!
DOWN: I planned too many errands into our morning, and after shopping at Aldi's, browsing/running around at ACMoore, and looking unsuccessfully for a good deal at Old Navy, there was some unwarranted snapping from me at a boy who was just tired and ready to go home.
UP: We tried painting for the first time today, and it was a hit! 
DOWN: Someone cried when I too harshly corrected him for dumping out more paint when I was in the bathroom washing the other boy's hands.
UP: They liked the homemade tomato soup (yay, avoiding all the sugar in that canned stuff).
DOWN: We dropped a full bowl of it on the floor.
UP: Both boys napped and practically put themselves to bed half an hour earlier than usual.
DOWN: Someone has developed a new SCREAM of outrage... it's seriously bloodcurdling.  It is used when he is not happy with how things are going.  This cannot continue.
UP: Looking at pictures from Daddy's trip and the boys asking to see more pictures of him, saying "My Daddy!" at every one.
DOWN: to daddy on the phone: "I think you should come home now."
UP: We checked off another day on our calendar... closer to daddy coming home. And I even completed another day in my challenge.

Goodnight!

More identity conversations

Conversation as we got ready for bedtime:

Me (to Micah who had draped his blanket over his head): are you a ghost... or a shepherd?
Micah: Mary!
Me: Oh, Hi Mary, where's your baby Jesus?
Micah: I don't know.  (looking around) In here. (pointing to my belly)
Micah: Who can be Joseph?  (looking around, indicating me) You're Joseph!
Titus: NO!  You can't be Joseph.  You're a girl.  I'm Joseph.
Micah: I'm Joseph too, I'm a boy.  Joseph is a boy.  A boy is a boy. (to me): You're Mary.
Titus: Mary is a girl; you're a girl.  Joseph is a boy.  Micah and I are boys. 

Looks like we have another identity puzzle piece in place. 

Twin Identities Not-in-Crisis

Today at lunchtime, we played a rousing game of "favorites."  My sons are deep in a favorites phase, where they have made strong attachments to particular things, and are learning to identify themselves with these things.  The most obvious one is favorite colors (see this post).  

To keep the fun times rolling, we worked through a few rounds of favorites.
Colors: orange/ red
Food: bread/ apples
Toy: trucks/ ambulance
Song: Jesus Loves Me/ Jesus Loves the Little Children (it has the word "red" in it)
Person to kiss: Mama/ Josh and Pete (haha)

Person to talk to on the phone: Nana and Papa/ Pete

Store: Shoprite/ Target 
Stuffed animal: tiger/ walrus 
Etcetera

They even threw some good ones at me, like what is my favorite room and my favorite fish.

I was amazed at the fact that their answers never overlapped, even when in reality, I'm sure they both love the Lord of the Beans DVD equally.  It's as if, once chosen by a brother, that item is off-limits.  We have a Dr Seuss book that asks "would you rather be a .... or a ..." on each page; they always choose opposing answers.

I take this as a good sign that we are NOT having a twin identity crisis at this phase of life.  They are developing into two distinct people with clear opinions and personalities.  I love this!  

The other week I looked over their Sunday School papers, and found one labeled "Micah" and the other labeled "Titus, definitely not Micah!"  I can only conclude that there was some uncertainty about names which Titus cleared up with some passion.  Good for him.  

Here's some of the things we do with the boys to encourage their individuality:

• Call them by name (almost never "the twins," though I do slip and say "the boys" often; see this post!).  We've done this since day one.
• Ask them individually: Do you want milk?  Would you like more broccoli? Which book would you like to read?  even when I know the answer.  Give each a chance to answer for himself.
• Encourage turn-taking.  "It's Micah's turn.  When he's done, it will be Titus' turn."  Asking them to share or play together is not helpful.
• Take pictures of them individually.  (This is pretty much unavoidable; good luck getting a picture of them together.) 
• Wear different clothes;  have different blankets; etc.
• Follow their developmental cues: I currently have one partly potty-trained and another not even working on it. 
• Surround them with people who love and value them as individuals (big shout out to Papa and Nana, Yaya and Elliott, Ms Linda, Pete and so many others here).

I see:

 I see:

my son running along the sidewalk.

I think: 

when did he get so tall?

I see:

my son going potty all by himself.

I think: 

how did he learn to do that?

I see:

the furrowed brow of concentration as my son snips paper.

I think: 

when did he become trustworthy with scissors?

I see:

a full-face smile when I greet my son after nap-time.

I think:

how did I get this much joy?

My son is not the first boy to be potty trained.  

They are not the first boys to learn to use scissors or to grow tall or to smile with such abundant joy. 

But it is the first time for me.  Forgive me if I revel in it... if I brag about it... if I bore you with the details... 

I am amazed.

The world is full of...

Finish this sentence: 

The world is full of _________________.

evil?

suffering?

trouble?

darkness?

 

I don't know how you would fill in the blank, but these are some of the first answers that come to my mind.

 

But I learned something last night:

 

"The world is full of his (God's) loving-kindness."

That's straight from the Bible, folks (Ps 33:5b), one of the most brutally honest books I've ever read.  It doesn't sugar coat.  This is the book that says things like: "all our righteous acts are like filthy rags" (Is 64:6) and "In this world you will have trouble" (Jn 16:33).

Today, I choose to BELIEVE and to SEE that the world is full of God's loving-kindness.  I choose to look for loving-kindness instead of sorrow and hardship and evil; those things are easy enough for me to spot.  Here's where I saw His loving-kindness to me today:

• an answered prayer for uninterrupted sleep (no kitty scratching at the bedroom door, no middle-of-the-night cries for water, or tuck-ins, or a lost stuffed animal)
• an early wake-up from God with time to pray and read (a novel!) and doze all before getting out of bed
• this sentence from my son (it just kept going and going): "I think I saw an orange banana outside last night when I went for a walk with Daddy.  (pause)  It was squished."
• a request for peas as the topping on a boy's english muffin pizza... and he ate it!  This made me smile so much!
• the knowledge that people are praying for us, and a very real experience of God's gracious answers to those prayers: joy, peace, contentment, freedom from fear and loneliness.

This is how the Psalm ends:

May your unfailing love rest upon us, 

O Lord,

even as we put our hope in you.

Ps 33:22 

You missed a spot

Mama, are you sad?

Yes, Micah.

Are you crying?

Yes, Micah.

What are you sad about?

Saying good-bye to daddy.

Oh.  wah-wah (fake crying)

 (me fake wiping his tears)

(me actually wiping my tears)

Mama, you missed a spot.  

Oh, sweet boys, I am so glad we're in this together.

Announcement... more posts coming!

Roses are red

Violets are blue

This blog has been dusty

My writing is rusty...

Here comes something new!

Announcing my intention to blog DAILY for 23 days, starting Feb 15th.  

Look for lots of fun twin boy stories.  

See you around!